Oh, thank God…

I am the Queen of the Not-Follow-Throughers. I completely intended to do that whole three-phase theme search that I wrote about several weeks ago, but…. I didn’t. I couldn’t think of a good idea for the “Universally Popular List” week, which isn’t so surprising as, if I could have, I would have done it already. I had a really good idea for the “Casual Journalism” theme, but I decided I wanted a new blog entirely for that as the name “Oh Thank God…” doesn’t really fit. But therein lies the problem: I can’t think of a name that a) fits and b) isn’t already taken. I’ve thought of a million different names and they all pretty much suk ballz.

So please just bear with me as I continue to regale you sporadically with tales from my life. Like this one:

As you may or may not know, my income is generated by the dedicated bagel-following of a local community. Kinda random, kinda mundane, but very tasty. Until now I’ve never been particularly loyal to one kind.

Garlic bagel + pizza sauce + a dash of Parmesan cheese = ohmigod heaven. I’m thoroughly addicted.

Now we don’t serve pizza sauce or parm at the cafe I work at, so at the end of the day if there are any garlic bagels left, I bring one home for my after-work snack, and oh do I look forward to that.
This is what happened today:

12:30 pm: There’s one lonely garlic bagel left in the basket. I say to co-worker #1, “Oh, I hope no one buys that bagel before the end of the day so I can have it for a snack!”
2:00 pm (Closing time): I’m rejoicing on the inside because there it sits, untouched, mixed in among the salt bagels. The doors have been locked (though one is still propped open with a chair so we don’t roast while we’re cleaning up), so there’s no hurry to claim it and put it in a bag away from the others just yet.
2:01 pm: A lady comes to the propped open door and asks if we’re still open. We’re not. Co-worker #2 generously lets her come in anyway. She mentions her love for garlic bagels. I begin to fear for my snack.
2:02 pm: I run into co-worker #1 in the kitchen and relate my fears to her. We go investigate the lady’s order; she’s standing at the register ready to pay and my bagel is still untouched!
2:02:30 pm: Co-worker #1 exclaims loudly about the situation, prompting the lady to inquire as to why co-worker #1 is exclaiming. Co-worker. #1 says, “Oh, it’s just that we had a bet about the one garlic bagel that’s left……..” Lady cuts in with, “Oh there’s a garlic bagel left? Can I have that one instead of the onion?”

Foiled. The late-coming thief gives me the biggest smile as she buys MY BAGEL and then leaves. With my bagel.

2:03 pm: I am reduced to shambles and have a left-over cookie instead.